“Hi! How are you?” they ask.
“I’m good! Tired. Busy. But good!!!” I respond, through tired eyes and a worn down body and mind. But with enthusiasm!!
If any one of my clients answered the “how are you” question the same way I do, I would sure as hell not let it slide. I’d ask more questions - how tired are you? Have you been sleeping well? Are you feeling more stress than usual this week? And I’d tailor their workout of the day and any nutrition advice I give based on their answers to those questions.
That’s how I coach. Yes, every workout is important, and ideally, my clients would tell me they’re feeling great - they sleep well, eat all their protein and veggies, stay hydrated, and are ready to train hard and effectively that day. But we don’t live in a perfect world, so my job is to help them perfect their routine and their habits to boost resilience to whatever stressors the imperfect world throws at them.
REST. Rest is essential.
Last week, one of my clients showed up to our session and didn’t even let me ask how she was doing before she said, “Haley, I’m exhausted beyond measure and stressed out of my mind. Can we please just go for a long walk tonight? I really need to vent and get some fresh air.”
YES WE CAN. I needed the fresh air, too, but I agreed immediately and felt so so proud of my client for asking that question because it meant she understood the importance of rest, of taking it easy when life feels extremely difficult.
Later that night, I posted this rest-is-essential reminder on my Instagram in hopes that it would reach more people who needed to hear it. I think it did, so mission: accomplished. But the person who really really REALLY needs to hear it is the one who says it over and over again to her clients. Me.
Life has been effing crazy since November last year, and it only got crazier post break-up LOL. The company I loved with every ounce of my being was pulled out from underneath me and I had to start building a new foundation - my own company. I’M SO GRATEFUL for every single client, every single supporter who has been by my side throughout this helluva process. I’ve never once felt alone or as anxious as I feared I might. That’s pretty damn incredible.
I do, however, feel exhausted and that’s on no one else but myself. Building a business and running it alone is no joke. Training 15 amazing humans for 1-3 hours each every week is no joke. Also, raising a puppy…. Don’t even get me started.
My exhaustion manifests in: digestive issues, mood swings (you won’t want to be around me), and hormone disruptions - all of which can contribute to a vicious cycle of constant exhaustion. For 75% of the last 4 months, I’ve felt exhausted.
I called my mom on the way home from my last session of a 12-hour day recently and when she asked “how are you?” I said, “Mom, listen to me. I am exhausted. I need both you and myself to hear me say those words, because otherwise, I won’t slow down and I won’t make the changes I need to make to feel better.” Writing this blog post will seal that deal.
Like I did with my client the night before, my mom listened and nodded her head and said “mmmhm” just like I needed her to. “I don’t need advice or resources - I know what I need to do and I just need to do it. My body is not superhuman. I cannot keep expecting it to handle this unsustainable lifestyle.” I said.
I’m not changing my career or taking on fewer clients or anything like that. Not gonna’ happen. What I am going to do is start S L O W I N G D O W N. Scheduling more days and nights for myself every week. Sitting in silence more often. Stretching after every workout. Taking a deep breath multiple times throughout the day. And the list goes on.
These might sound like such simple tasks, but they can make all the difference in reducing stress levels if they aren’t already part of a healthy lifestyle.
So, here’s my reminder to you, because I know I’m not the only one out there who struggles with chronically doing too much.
Your worth is not defined by how much you accomplish. Your worth is inherently YOU.
Take good care of YOU.
