It's a weird age, this twenty-second year of life. I still don't know what I'm doing. Sometimes I pretend like I do and other times I embrace with welcoming arms my lack of life experience. Here's a fun list of 22 things I've learned thus far in life (in no particular order). Happy birthday to meeeee!
1. There IS a difference between baking soda and baking powder and YES I spent roughly a week of this 22nd year of mine researching that difference so that my cookies will both crunch and chew, so that my pancakes and waffles will fluff, so that my cakes will rise and bind. Discovering this difference and seeing it in action (via several rounds of recipe testing) was pretty friggin' satisfying.
2. I have feelings! For years, I held my emotions under tight control and I still don't know why exactly, but now that I've let go of that, I just f e e l a lot more. I mean everything from "MAN this donut tastes good" to "ohmyword I hate my period I hate my period I hate my period" to "you guys are the absolute best friends I've ever had and I'm way beyond any describable form of happiness but also terrified for the day when you're no longer my roommates" to "dear Jesus, I think I love this boy, so please help me because I could completely utterly mess this up if I have full control" and everything else in between.
3. Cast-iron skillets are gifts from above. If you're doubtful or confused, get one and use it whenever possible and you'll understand.
4. I have a capacity to love and to be loved so wide and so deep that it sometimes scares the bajeebers out of me. I crave intimacy - sometimes romantic, but not always - and authenticity and quality time and meaningful touch. I want to bring light and joy and radiance, to support and encourage and uplift. And I want to give those just as much as I want to receive them.
5. Wine is a beautiful liquid (does that word make you uncomfortable? if so, liquid.) resulting from fermentation which is basically organic chemistry and I took an organic chemistry class that I both loved + hated and I love wine (I don't hate it). Rosè is the shiz. No questions asked.
6. Scary movies are actually quite enjoyable, if you ask me and if you play the right ones that don't involve flesh-hacking and copious amounts of blood. Let yourself laugh when adrenaline kicks in as the music picks up speed and you know something is about to go down. Try it - this could change your movie-watching experience forever.
7. Farmers markets and the farmers themselves deserve all the attention and love and support we can possibly give them. The power of local food is just above and beyond.
8. Your career isn't over just because those recipe photos didn't turn out. Shut up. Put your camera away for the day. Wait until you find better lighting, and move on. It's not that big of a deal.
9. Family. The single most important thing in this life (to me, at least). Words cannot do it justice. Blessing is the under-est of all understatements. To my family, I couldn't love more!
10. Food - be it a cheeseburger, a kale salad, a cupcake, a jar of peanut butter, a bowl of Dad's post-holiday ham mac n' cheese (stupidly good), an ice cream cone, or a plate of veggies and hummus - is not worth your stress, is not more important than your friends or family, is not the end-all, be-all, is not the single most significant determinant of your health. It does not have power you. It does not deserve all your brain-power everyday just to stay within x-amount of calories or macronutrients. THERE IS MORE TO LIFE.
11. That being said, it's okay - it's admirable, even - to choose foods that honor your own wellbeing and physical comfort. It's okay to opt for the salad and/or a slice of veggie pizza if the pepperoni doesn't feel good or sound good. It's okay to ask for a whole-wheat bun because you want those nutrients, to make cookies with almond flour and coconut sugar because the traditional ones aren't always a smart snack, to love smoothies with spinach and protein powder for breakfast, to not get a donut at midnight just because your friends are doing it and maybe you want to sleep well and wake up early so a donut isn't the best bedtime snack. It's admirable to prioritize nutrition in ways that don't hinder your enjoyment of life.
12. This one is for Dad - breakfast is the best meal of the day, and bacon makes it even better (if possible). Oh, and vegan bacon doesn't count.
13. I'm stuck somewhere between a coffee-shopping, book-reading, blog-writing introvert and a Friday-night-dancing, laughter-loving, people-craving extrovert. What a weird place to be in. When I'm caught in the middle and can't decide towards which side I should lean, I usually find myself nestled in Barnes and Noble in downtown SLO on a Friday night, browsing cookbooks and love stories. It's a happy-medium. :)
14. You can learn quite a bit about someone's mood and/or personality based on their choice of donut. After just six months working at a college-town's favorite donut shop, I like to think I know these things. If you and I ever go get donuts together, just know that I'm analyzing your decision. :)
15. This one is for Mom - hand-written notes, whether for birthdays or anniversaries or graduations or really just any type of day, are extraordinary forms of expressing love.
16. Print out your photos and frame them. Do it.
17. Your heart will break at some point. Maybe more than once and maybe just once. It'll hurt like hell and you'll cry, so get yourself a box or six of tissues and at least one or two people who love you dearly.Know that it is temporary. Trust that you will be strengthened into a human more resilient than you were before. Smile. Love who you are and cherish your heart.
18. Never underestimate the power of laughter. Never underestimate a black bean brownie. Never underestimate a night out with best friends. Never underestimate the beauty of a beach sunset.
19. Food-blogging is not what I thought it would be, and I don't really know if I remember exactly what I thought it would be, but this isn't really it. That being said, I love this - whatever it is - and I'm still here, so something must be going right... or at least right enough. I hesitate to call this a food-blog (especially recently because the last recipe I posted came out over a month ago) mostly because just about everything I've learned in the last four years of life has taught me that life is s o O o O o O o O much more than just food. Life is sunsets and coffee dates and good books and belly-aching laughter and birds chirping on Sunday mornings and grandparents and even more than all of that, too. Those are just a few of the best parts. Point is: life's more than food and so is this blog.
20. God is somewhere. I'm still figuring out where. I'm confused, more often than not, but faith is a work in progress (or something like that).
21. Stress can be physically damaging, so try not to stress. But don't stress about stressing/not being able to relieve stress because that's worse. Just take a deep breath. Cry, if you need to. Do whatever you need to. Call a friend. Take a walk. Step outside. Run. Scream. Smile (even if it's forced). Eat a cookie. Bake cookies for a loved one.
22. Find yourself, and when you do, love her (or him, but I think most of your are women). Hug her and remind her that she is more than just pretty eyes and a bright smile. Encourage her and speak kindly to her. Give her rest and get her excited. Let her feel fear and pain and disappointment, but not for too long and not without learning from those emotional experiences. Take care of her and strengthen her everyday. Remember that she is truly all yours, that she is creative and intelligent and stunning and funny and worth it all.