Before I launch the Fitness and Nutrition page on HH, I want to share my story and what led me to this intersection of food, nutrition, and fitness.
If it seems like an odd transition from professing my obsession with sourdough to sharing my favorite workouts and best, most relevant and research-backed nutrition tips… I get that. I can step into the shoes of someone looking from the outside in and understand the potential confusion and, like, “whaaat? You workout? Like lift weights and do HIIT and stuff? And you know your fitness and nutrition research?”
Did someone flip a switch in me?
No. The truth is, I’ve always been this way. I’ve always loved waking up early to move and challenge my body in the gym. I’ve always geeked out on nutrition topics, especially sports nutrition. None of this is new to me - in fact, it’s part of me. Aside from a few interesting personality fun-facts - like, I can burp really loud, I love dumb Dad jokes, and the list continues - this passion for fitness and nutrition makes me me.
Just like my food-blogging career has been more than brown butter cookies and cinnamon rolls, this journey has been more than just burpees and kettlebells, broccoli and chicken, though.
A little over six years ago, I was medically diagnosed with an eating disorder. At the time, “orthorexia” wasn’t an established eating disorder, so my doctor went with anorexia nervosa. Now, however, as trends have changed, orthorexia is much more well-known and widely diagnosed. It’s an unhealthy obsession with food and exercise, characterized by extreme food restriction and excessive exercise habits. I know it all very well.
In high school, I was a track athlete who trained for an extra hour after every practice, rain or shine, day or night. I counted every calorie and left no room for anything I deemed unhealthy. My coaches praised my work ethic and performance, and my peers admired my dedication and my physique. I thrived on the outside - on the track, in the mirror, in social gatherings - but I struggled on the inside. My relationships suffered greatly from the restrictions I established in my life. I traded in going out to eat and having sleepovers with friends, enjoying dinners and movie nights with my parents for heavy mental and emotional stress, my once-healthy menstrual cycle, and a whole handful of other things for a smaller jean size and a sense of control, validity, and physical beauty.
Years of food restriction, exercise addiction, and resulting mental and physical health issues caught up to me in college. I never “let loose”, but rather, tried to understand and practice Intuitive Eating. I tried to manage my own recovery while balancing college classes, two jobs, and a social life. I didn’t nail it, by any means, but I did get better. I allowed myself to eat and to rest, and I pursued other passions outside of fitness and nutrition.
One of the trickiest parts of recovering was balancing a passion for food and joyful movement with a passion for training and sports nutrition. I love cinnamon rolls and I love kale, and I can happily enjoy both of those foods anytime I want now, but three years ago, living comfortably in the in-between was so difficult.
I spent my working-time the last two or three years in the food, restaurant, and hospitality industry and I spent my free-time researching sports nutrition and proper training techniques. The two passions remained disconnected for so long - maybe for a purpose I don’t yet know.
Maybe to bring me here, where I can now live comfortably as a nutrition graduate, still just as passionate as she first was, and soon-to-be fitness and nutrition professional. I believe, for whatever the purpose may be, that I had to experience such restriction to appreciate freedom and self-care. I also had to step away from fitness and nutrition for a little while for my passions in these areas to illuminate my goals and aspirations in life.